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November 16
The wonderful public transport system!
I’ve decided I’m not going to apologise for the lateness of my blog entry, you all know what I am like so just deal with it.
As most of you maybe aware I have the great pleasure of travelling on public transport to and from work, and as I gaze endlessly through my window, mindlessly listening to my music, wishing with all my might that work will give me the day of work with pay, I can’t help but have a strong desire to publish the official guide to public transport etiquette. This guide, classically titled ‘So you’re too poor to drive to work?’ will be a bible for public transportees. Containing commandments and expectations, which one should be made aware of before venturing onto Brisbane’s public transport system.
Commandment 1: Thou shalt not push in the queue. ESPECIALLY when there is obviously an orderly queue.
Commandment 2: Thou shalt not pay for a $2.10 fare with a $20 note. That’s just plain stupid!
Commandment 3: Thou shall NEVER stop every bus asking for directions! There’s this new fancy contraption called a phone, USE IT PEOPLE! Transinfo has been created to serve ONLY this purpose of enquiring about bus services.
As for expectations, WELL! I don’t know how much I can stress this to people, but for the love of god USE DEODORANT! I do not care if you have just finished a 12 hour shift, nor do I care if you have just finished a 2 hour session at the gym. I, nor does anyone else wants to smell your personal body odour.
May I also add that lazy people are STRICTLY prohibited from catching a bus for 1 bus stop. I understand that legs are actually designed for walking, so USE THEM!
In addition there are certain ideals that bus drivers should observe, such as:
A ‘EXPRESS’ bus is designed to arrive at a destination faster than a regular service bus. You may think that this is pretty self explanatory. BUT I have been a passenger on an express service bus which followed the same path as a regular service bus. Problem being that bus in front of us stop at EVERY BUS STOP! Thus we stopped too.
May I also point out that this is what the right hand driving lane is for, to overtake.
You may think I’m being a tad nazi-like with this rant, and I properly am. But I feel if everyone adheres to these commandments and expectations my life (and in essence everyone else’s life) will be that more pleasant.
Thank you for your attention – you may go now!
As most of you maybe aware I have the great pleasure of travelling on public transport to and from work, and as I gaze endlessly through my window, mindlessly listening to my music, wishing with all my might that work will give me the day of work with pay, I can’t help but have a strong desire to publish the official guide to public transport etiquette. This guide, classically titled ‘So you’re too poor to drive to work?’ will be a bible for public transportees. Containing commandments and expectations, which one should be made aware of before venturing onto Brisbane’s public transport system.
Commandment 1: Thou shalt not push in the queue. ESPECIALLY when there is obviously an orderly queue.
Commandment 2: Thou shalt not pay for a $2.10 fare with a $20 note. That’s just plain stupid!
Commandment 3: Thou shall NEVER stop every bus asking for directions! There’s this new fancy contraption called a phone, USE IT PEOPLE! Transinfo has been created to serve ONLY this purpose of enquiring about bus services.
As for expectations, WELL! I don’t know how much I can stress this to people, but for the love of god USE DEODORANT! I do not care if you have just finished a 12 hour shift, nor do I care if you have just finished a 2 hour session at the gym. I, nor does anyone else wants to smell your personal body odour.
May I also add that lazy people are STRICTLY prohibited from catching a bus for 1 bus stop. I understand that legs are actually designed for walking, so USE THEM!
In addition there are certain ideals that bus drivers should observe, such as:
A ‘EXPRESS’ bus is designed to arrive at a destination faster than a regular service bus. You may think that this is pretty self explanatory. BUT I have been a passenger on an express service bus which followed the same path as a regular service bus. Problem being that bus in front of us stop at EVERY BUS STOP! Thus we stopped too.
May I also point out that this is what the right hand driving lane is for, to overtake.
You may think I’m being a tad nazi-like with this rant, and I properly am. But I feel if everyone adheres to these commandments and expectations my life (and in essence everyone else’s life) will be that more pleasant.
Thank you for your attention – you may go now!
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end of ed's rant :P
Have fun.